What's the purpose...

of investing in a group I see twice a week or less and often less than that because I'm busy with so many other things? A group that I hardly talk to outside of our two meetings weekly, and most of whom I don't even go to school with. Don't get me wrong. I've enjoyed almost every aspect of being with the group, and I've allowed it almost a year and a half's time, but the distance and schedule differences between us are just so great...

I'm toying around very seriously now about joining that music frat. Sure it will suck up most of my free time on Fridays and Saturdays, and every other day... but at least these will be people I'm around all the time, call my brothers and feel accepted.

Hmm.. A or B?

****

On another note, the concerto competition was today. As predicted none of the classical concertos even placed... except for one doctoral student's Beethoven 2 and that's because she was amazing! I probably didn't prepare well enough anyway, considering I was scrambling just to have the thing memorized well- and I started last semester!! *Sigh* it's my hope to play with an orchestra in my undergrad. If I decide to take the choral conducting route, I may never get the chops or opportunity to do so ever again...

Next time: romantic or contemporary concerto!!

-KKZ

KKZ is...

Thinking about joining a fraternity.

Yes you read that right. A frat.

But not a dirty, stereotypical frat where everyone gets drunk... A REAL, legit one. A music one. With many friends I already know...

Who knows?? This may help me not feel so lonely and alienated in Houston (story of my life for the past year).

And most people who think about frats give it negative connotation. Perhaps. But not this one..

-KKZ

There are times when we all feel like lonely, insane, idiots...

Right now is one of those times... I would like to wake up tomorrow morning and think that the whole past year and a half has just been a big, unreal dream...

There's nothing like watching a movie all alone and crying on and off for an hour straight until you fall asleep, a third of the box of kleenex gone-- this after a shitty day. You should try it sometime...

Heart broken. Brain in a mess. Life confusing.

Emo in a box? Yeah, that'll be $14.50, please.